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7.20.2006


not good

It's been a while since I posted about my dad. For those of you whom are unaware, my dad has been suffering with Multiple Myeloma (blood cancer - also known as plasma cell myeloma) since 2001. It has been a long, tiring battle. We thought we had it under control. However, inside of 3 months, his cancer had aggressively progressed to manifest itself as lesions on the bone - as the doctors said, "It's just the way that the disease progresses." It goes to show us that nothing is in our control.

I am not ready for his disease to progress. He is going to begin radiation treatments today and he is going to try another chemotherapy in the pill form, but the grim response from his doctors is not encouraging. I am not trying to be all about doom and gloom. I know miracles happen and I know we have experienced many miracles with his progress thus far. It's just disheartening to see him worse than he's ever been and to know that the cancer is eating at his bones causing him terrible, terrible pain.

This is my daddy, I'm talking about. He's not just my father. He's been the strong arms to throw me into the air when I was a girl, his were the footsteps through the front door that sent me running, he is the gentle giant always on my side, he is the buddy I turn to when I'm frustrated, he was the proud and smiling vision from behind my wedding veil and until my husband, he was the leading man in my life. He's my daddy and he's in pain. His soft baby blues betray him, even through his strong countenance and bravado. He is in pain and he is scared. I don't think anything has scared me this much, in a very, very long time.

I am weary and trying my best to lean on Christ. I know He takes the burdens from my shoulders. I know He is the only way through all of this. Please pray for him.

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